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Showing posts from October, 2015

D45 Sticking To The Plan

Today I'm not feeling so great. Very PMS-y and a little broken out and tired and normally when I feel this way I give myself permission to loosen the reigns a little and encourage myself to eat my emotions. Hormones have me feeling wonky and I'll probably gain due to them anyways so it's OK to go ahead and indulge.

The problem with that is I'm eating my emotions and that's NOT OK. I've been working really hard to focus on remembering that FOOD IS FUEL. Food is not a bandaid; eating crap because I'm hormonal isn't going to change the fact that I'm hormonal. If my hormones were making me physically hungry then of course I should eat because if you're hungry, you're hungry!! It's OK to eat more than you expected to or more than you planned to during the day if you legitimately need to. But overeating because I have an emotional desire is NOT OK.

I struggle with binge eating and for me one little slip leads to a snowball effect and before I kn…

D44 Good Food + Good Exercise = Good Mood

Keeping today short and sweet because I'm exhausted! It was a fun filled day starting with Zumba!! Unfortunately I couldn't stay after Zumba for yoga but next week I will :) I contemplated not going to Zumba this morning because it was warm and cozy in my bed; I even reset my alarm for an hour later and said "I'll skip Zumba today and run instead" but I really like Zumba and I ran into a couple classmates during the week at the gym while lifting weights and they both asked me if they'd see me Friday morning and I promised them that YES!! I'd be there!! It felt good that they cared enough to ask and I'm sure they wouldn't be disappointed if I wasn't there today it made me feel special that they cared enough to ask if I would.

I love my Weight Watchers meeting for the same reason I'm loving my Zumba class-accountability! I love seeing the same people and meeting new friends and I love that they encourage and inspire me and when I think about …

D43 I Work Out...:-P

Today I had push and legs planned for weights and 30 mins of cardio on the elliptical and I planned a light english muffin with 2 points worth of peanut butter and an apple for a pre-workout snack. I didn't plan on being up before 6 a.m. but I've been sleeping like a champ since I've increased my workouts and waking up feeling refreshed and ready to take on the day!

However, my eyes didn't spring open this a.m. all by was my dog! As always! I had my alarm set for 7 a.m. but she had me up at 5:53 a.m. I wasn't going to go back to bed for another hour and I wasn't going to reset my alarm for later because I wanted to make sure I had enough time this morning to watch American Horror Story...LOL!!!!!!! Hey, whatever works.

So instead I made my way to the couch with my snack and my coffee and then headed out to the gym. I earned 5 AP's before 8:30 a.m.!! Woo!! I have to work 1-9 today so hopefully the energy boost I have been experiencing fr…

D42 A Little Bummed...

Insert long drawn out sigh here...

I weighed in this evening and after doing really great all week I was up 0.4 but it is what it is. I kicked ass this week, I couldn't have done anything differently to be totally honest and I'm really proud of myself despite the scale trying to deny my efforts. I had some GREAT NSV's including buying smaller pants, earning 40 (yes! 40!!) AP's for the first time EVER (YESSSSS!!! I love PR's!!!) and sticking to my goals like no snacks at work despite the fact that alllllllll dayyyyy Saturday there was a plate of cookies sitting on the table in the break room. I didn't have 1, not even a crumb.

Sometimes we gain and there's no good reason for it and that's what this week was. Maybe it's hormones, maybe it's water retention for whatever reason, I don't know but I do know I did my best this week and I didn't have a pity binge this evening after weighing in :) GO ME!

I looked back long and hard at my week in an …

D41 Checking In On October Goals

I can't believe October is almost over! I just realized that today and I realized I have NO idea where I stand right now with accomplishing the goals I set for myself and I should probably check in because it's crunch time and I need to put in some serious work if I want to meet all those goals!

-Earn 65 AP's for the month (I know some people who do this in a week...)
Woohoo! Check that one off the list! As of right now (and the month isn't over yet!) I'm at 70!! YAY!! 

-Increase my weights at the gym
Check! Every time I go I work a little harder and I've increased my weights pretty significantly since the beginning of the month :)

-No more than 2 rest days a week
*sigh* Didn't get this one. There was one week that I had 3 rest days but I can't be perfect! I'll try this one again in November :) And hey, if it counts I only took 1 rest day this week!

-Get a pedicure (me-time is important!!!)

I didn't do this yet but there are still a few days left in…

D40 "If Only..."

I often find myself thinking "if only..."

...if only I had started sooner...

...if only I hadn't taken that "break"...
...if only I had been consistent about lifting weights...
...if only I believed in myself then the way I believe in myself now...
...if only I had known then what I know...
How would my journey be different? Would I be at goal by now? Would my body look different? Would I be more successful?

But the truth is if only doesn't matter! What matters is what I do now and from this moment forward. The time I spent not doing what I'm doing now, the breaks I took, the inconsistency with food and working out all brought me to where I am now. I'm not the kind of person who learns by succeeding right off the bat. The frustrating truth is I need to fall on my face a million times so I can learn to get up! Getting up after I fall is like lifting weights, haha! The more I do it the stronger I get!!

Everything happens for a reason, everything happens the w…

D39 Looking Forward To The Gym

I'm so excited tomorrow is Monday and I get to go to the gym!! :-D I have been looking forward to it since Thursday, LOL! I worked out Friday and Saturday and rested today but I'm looking forward to lifting weights again tomorrow. I'm really, really enjoying it!

I feel like I'm really making some great progress and I swear I can see the changes happening in my body. I took measurements in September and my trainer said it's best to take them every 3 months so I'm waiting til December but I want to take them NOW!!!

It's like when you have one day of REALLY good eating and you want to weigh yourself because you feel like you MUST have dropped 5 pounds already. LOL I need to be patient and just enjoy feeling good :) So that's what I'm going to do.

Tomorrow is legs and push day so I'm doing squats, lunges, adductor and abductor machine, shoulder presses, triceps, and chest; Tuesday I'll do pull and abs with my trainer :) Tomorrow I'm going to us…

D38 Party Success...?

Today was better as far as my level of crankiness but it's late now and I'm tired so I'm cranky but with reason. ;-) It was a long but successful day despite many obstacles.

I got everything ready for today last night; breakfast, lunch, snacks for the day packed and tracked! I even laid out gym clothes "just in case" figuring I'd play it by ear and see how I felt when the alarm went off at 6:15 a.m. Well it went off and I reset it for 7:15 a.m. planning to skip my workout today since it was a bonus anyways and wasn't really necessary. But my dog heard the alarm go off and as soon as she hears one of us stir she's ready to eat! So, I decided to get up and go exercise (after I fed her of course!)

I got dressed and headed to the gym because it was too dark to run outside and I don't have a flashlight or safety vest. The Y opens at 5 a.m. on weekdays so I assumed it would be open at 5 today (a Saturday) too but GUESS WHAT...when I pulled into the parkin…

D37 Cranky Pants

Man I am CRANKY today!! Stay away from me, haha!! I have no idea why, but just one of them days I guess!! So in order to try to set myself up for a better mood tomorrow I'm going to take 5 seconds now to list a few good things that have happened today (or in general):a cozy beda loving wifeadorable petspayday Friday!amazing clientsa full scheduleworkoutsfood packed and trackedyummy foodsupportive familysleepzumbazumba class participants who make me feel SO welcomeamazing WW members who keep me accountable on Facebookyoga for the first time in FOREVER hot stone massagerain shower massagebody scrubsbody wrapsgood friendsHalloween partiessleepdelicious breakfast (eggs, turkey sausage patty and light toast with cinnamon and truvia-SO GOOD!)Today was wonderful! It was a super productive day! Very, VERY busy at work but thankfully I packed lunch last night (as I always do!) so I could go to Zumba AND yoga this a.m.!! Didn't realize how much yoga would help me feel looser...I didn…

D36 "Why Is it Different This Time?"

So last night was weigh in at Weight Watchers and I was down 2 pounds! Crazy, right!? I definitely didn't expect that...I was thinking it would be quite amazing to be down 2.4 pounds because that would put my at my 100 again but I didn't expect that I'd actually be down 2 pounds!! I was shocked and thrilled and I'm actually not disappointed that I didn't lose an additional .4 because I worked my ass off this week and I lost 3 last week so I expected a little rebound gain despite my hard work this week as that tends to be what happens. However, I tended to reward myself with copious amounts of food on Wednesday's; the more I lost the more I'd eat; that probably had a LOT to do with my "rebound" gain. Since I'm not doing that now, maybe that's why I lost this week?

I'm not sure but I know it wasn't luck.

When I weighed in I said to the receptionist (one of my absolutely FAVORITE people in the whole world!) "yay! So close! This tim…

D35 Please Don't Be Discouraged By My Timeline

When people ask how much weight I've lost I proudly tell them 97.6 (or whatever the number is at the time they ask) and smile feeling accomplished and proud. But then comes the question that makes me sad.
"How long did it take?"

Why does it make me sad to tell you that it's been a 4+ year journey? Because I'm afraid that people are going to be discouraged when they hear that my transformation wasn't an overnight experience. With so many shakes, pills, wraps and supplements boasting quick results and weight loss surgery being easily accessible these days I feel like we've come to expect that weight loss shouldn't take time. To be fair weight loss surgery is a huge commitment and I definitely don't believe it's "the easy way out" and some of those programs DO offer quick results and I've seen some dramatic and quick transformations! But, weight loss surgery was not for me and I'm nervous about supplements and what effect they mig…

D34 Why I Find My "After" More Beautiful Than My Before (NO! It's NOT Because I'm Thinner)

So I have the timehop app that shows you pictures or statuses you posted on Facebook a year or 2 or 5 I found a picture that I took 5 years ago, pre Weight Watchers right around the time I was considering gastric bypass surgery because I felt fat, overwhelmed and out of options. I needed to lose more than 100 pounds and I'd tried and failed before so I was convinced weight loss surgery was my only option so I started the process of seminars, visits with the nutritionist and the surgeon...

Obviously I changed my mind but I already told you that story so I won't tell you again. You can find it on my blog though if you're so inclined.
I saw the picture today and it was crazy! I couldn't believe that was me. I look SO different! My hair, my features, my was like looking at a picture of someone else but at the same time I could give you so many details about the day so I knew it was really me. It felt good to see it and so I made a side-by-side for #tran…

D33 Overcoming Obstacles & Excuses

So you think something is impossible? I understand. I thought running was impossible for me. For starters I was 100 pounds overweight and then I tore my cartilage in my knee and had surgery to repair it; medial cartilage repair and lateral release. Well things didn't go quite as according to plan and I ended up with 2 blood clots (DVT) in my leg and a whole bunch of scar tissue which was extremely painful and my quad atrophied like a little raisin in the sun. I had a second surgery to remove the scar tissue and do another lateral release 4 months after the first horrendous surgery and this one went better than the first but I was still incapable of doing anything with my right leg. It was ridiculous! I couldn't walk on it, I couldn't even lift it! I had to hook my left foot under my right ankle to move my right leg. It was the longest 7 months of my life.

Once I finally started walking again it was slow but steady and very painful progress but it was progress. The doctor ne…

D32 My EASY Pumpkin Oatmeal Recipe

1/2 C pure pumpin puree (NOT PUMPKIN PIE FILLING!)
1/2 C unsweetened cashew milk (or your milk of choice)
1/2 C Old fashioned oats
1 tbsp vanilla extract
Truvia and cinnamon to taste (I know that's not very helpful but I don't measure it!)

*optional-2 tsp canola oil to check off a GHG, you can't taste it I promise!

Combine pumpkin, milk and vanilla extract and bring to a slow boil over medium-high heat stirring frequently. Add Truvia (or other sweetener) and cinnamon to desired taste. Stir in oats, return to boil stirring frequently. Reduce heat, cover and simmer 5-10 minutes. The longer it sits the softer the oats get. Enjoy!!

5 PointsPlus (7 if you add the oil!)

Delicious, simple and best of all EASY!! Just the way I like my breakfast :)

D31 Forgiveness

Today I'm pooped. Just utterly exhausted! And whenever I get super tired I find I'm hungrier than usual and today is no exception. I made great choices all day but my wife bought herself a chocolate bar and I practically ripped her head off. It's hers, she didn't buy it for me or offer it to me and just because I'm trying to stay on plan doesn't mean she can't indulge! And in all honesty I do have the points for a chocolate bar, I just don't have the desire for one. But I still got pissed at her for getting one and then quickly realized I should eat dinner and shut up so I did. I also apologized and she laughed it off as she always does.

At dinner there was just a teeny tiny bit left over; not enough to save but enough to make me feel guilty for tossing it so I served it to myself and at first said "it's just a bite, I don't have to count it." and then I remembered my promise to myself to track EVERYTHING so I did. I'm over my DPT b…

D30 ZUMBA!!!

I haven't been to Zumba in years! I used to go once or twice a week with my mom but after our instructor left we never returned and then I switched gyms and I was afraid to go alone. I signed up for the YMCA over a year ago and a huge part of why I picked the Y was for the classes. I kept promising myself I was going to go but couldn't convince myself to be brave enough just to take the plunge. I did take 1 spin class but I hated it and I haven't been brave enough to try another group exercise yet. It's scary going alone! I have no one to laugh at myself with if I'm alone...if I'm alone everyone is just going to laugh at me and I'm going to feel like such a loser...or I can walk in like I'm the cool girl and not care what anyone else thinks. I'm here to work out, not impress you!! That confidence is fleeting though. 99% of the time I'm like "they're all gonna laugh!" and 1% of the time I'm like "let em!"

This morning g…

D29 100 Pounds...Then Vs. Now

It felt good to wake up this morning after being so successful last night both at Weight Watchers and after the meeting as far as not binging. Wednesday's always make me feel a little anxious for a couple of reasons. 1) it's my weigh in night and I'm still trying to remember that the scale is only one measure of success so being up or not down enough doesn't mean I failed and 2) it was my "cheat" (aka binge) night and I'm always afraid I might slip back into that habit again.

But last night before my meeting I made spaghetti sauce and and a salad and after my meeting I came home and boiled the pasta and put my pre-made salad on a plate and it was all kinds of amazing and delicious but also made from all Power Foods and guilt free. I weighed, measured and tracked everything. I did use a few of my AP's but I still had 8 (out of 16) left and all of my 49.

I used to use all of my AP's and all of my WP's every week and I think it's definitely pos…

D28 Letting Old Habits Die

When I first started Weight Watchers I always used my weigh in night as "cheat night" as my reward to myself for working really hard all week. Tracking every point, weighing and measuring every ounce and saying no to pretty much anything I wanted that wasn't "healthy" was exhausting work and by the time weigh in night rolled around I was ready to let loose and have a little fun.

In other words, every weigh in night was a binge night :-\

And the day after every weigh in night I woke up with a food hangover feeling fat and still full from everything I ate. So many carbs, so much fat, so much CRAP! I'd eat crap I didn't even want because I might want it later in the week or I wanted it last month and I said no. I'd start the day with a breakfast sandwich from Dunkin Donuts and chase that with a donut and a coffee with extra cream and extra sugar...dinner was almost always something fried, definitely fattening and I definitely ate WAY too much of it...bec…

D27 An Ode To My Personal Trainer

Today my trainer texted me and asked if I had gone to the gym yet and when I told her I was headed there after lunch she asked if I wanted to come work out with her instead. I figured why not? She was doing arms and abs and I needed to work out so I headed on over and did a total body weights session.

I've never done that before! Usually when I work out with her she's training me so it was an interesting shift in dynamic to work out WITH her. It's like seeing your teacher outside of school...and I liked it!

While we were working out a mutual friend (our hairdresser! And the girl who set us up) called and said she wanted to come over and go for a run and they invited me so again I figured why not? I haven't been challenging myself when I've been running alone and I've been thinking about asking someone who's a stronger runner to run with me but I'm afraid to...I don't want to look like a jerk in front of someone else...thinking I'm such a great run…

D26 Taking Things Easy May Make Things Harder

Sometimes we need to slow down, take it easy, rest and relax. And that's OK! When you work hard you should play hard; balance is key to being successful in life, not just weight loss.

Sometimes shortcuts make things faster, more convenient and easier and sometimes that's OK! It's hard for me to get my oil GHG so I came up with a solution--put it in my smoothie! Along with a ton of spinach of course. Then I'm checking a bunch of GHG's off! 2 healthy oils, 1 dairy, 3 servings veggies...tada!! Easy peasy, super convenient, yummy and DONE. Sometimes easy works but sometimes easy makes things even harder.

I hate when that happens.

I ran today and when I first started I really didn't want to. I was convinced it was going to be hard and I didn't want it to be hard because I was tired and quite honestly feeling really lazy and I didn't want to challenge myself. But I didn't want to walk either and I really had no choice in the matter; if I didn't I wasn…

D25 Food Is Fuel

I'm tired so keeping this short and sweet but I committed to a blog EVERY DAY and today is no exception :)

I've been doing OK this week but my fitness has been TERRIBLE because I've been working crazy hours and not fitting in time for the gym. But food wise I've been good. Today I woke up and I was in the mood to eat. I wasn't hungry I just wanted to eat and it was difficult but I didn't give into the urge. All day I fought it in fact.

I made myself scrambled eggs with 2 slices of light toast with cinnamon and truvia and an orange for breakfast with a cup of pumpkin coffee with pumpkin creamer of course;brought an apple and a WW smoothie with spinach and oil for a snack; had left over turkey kielbasa and 1/2 cup baked beans for lunch; dinner was a sweet potato-o and a Gorton's salmon filet with broccoli and desert was unsweetened applesauce. It's not a little after 10:30 and I'm heading into bed feeling physically satisfied and having stayed within my…

D24 Healthy Isn't A Size, It's A Lifestyle

Scrolling through Facebook I stumbled across a picture someone posted on a weight loss group I'm part of and I LOVED it so of course I stole it and posted it on Instagram (@writing_my_success_story if you want to follow me!)

I think often we look at people who are slim and think "they're healthy!" and conversely we look at someone who is bigger and say "they should lose weight...that's not healthy"

But the truth is you can't tell by looking at someone how healthy or unhealthy they are. At my start weight I was morbidly obese according to the BMI chart but I had no health issues that were caused by my weight. No high blood sugar, no high blood pressure, cholesterol was good, heart was good and I had pretty good stamina when working out; of course it's better now that I've been working out a lot more but it wasn't terrible back then. To look at me you'd probably think I was terribly out of shape and must have a plethora of health issues …