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D63 Hormonal?

I'll spare you all the gory details but I'm pretty sure I'm PMSing. I don't know for sure but I feel puffy and fat and really, really ugly and insecure. It's a feeling I don't like, one I'm NOT OK with but one I know will pass because I've felt this way a million times.

Despite not feeling myself I worked out with my trainer, got my hair cut and my eyebrows threaded (which made me feel much better!) and threw on some makeup to meet my family for dinner (which got cancelled last minute. Probably a good thing since I'm feeling kind of icky and might have made some bad choices because of it.) Feeling pretty makes me feel better, even though I didn't feel thin, toned and confident like I have been lately it was nice to be able to see out from under my eyebrows (lol!) and I got a couple of compliments on my hair which always makes me feel good.

Maybe I'm a little vain, but at least I'm honest ;-)

I'm not looking forward to weighing in tomorrow night. I'm probably holding water due to the same hormones that are making me a raging bitch but maybe I'm not. Maybe I'm just paranoid because I had a bad night Wednesday and I emotionally ate Friday and my workouts were subpar this week...I need to remember how I feel RIGHT NOW so that when I'm tempted to overeat and not track or half ass or totally skip a workout I can remind myself that the reason I track what I eat, eat well and work out is because IT MAKES ME FEEL BETTER!!!


But in the grand scheme of things, tomorrow is one day. It's a drop in the bucket. If I'm up, I'll be down the next week...or the week after. It doesn't really matter at all if I'm up tomorrow; I'll take off anything I gain.

I've kind of accepted that tomorrow will be a crappy weigh in and though I'm trying to remain optimistic I'm also really ready for Thursday because it's a fresh start, a new week and I like new weeks. They're symbolic to me.

Speaking of NEW...today is a new month! December 1...so I need some goals but I've been working my ass off all day and I'm really tired so I didn't really dedicate any time to thinking about them...so...I'm stealing from October.

-Track EVERY SINGLE THING!! Even on "Weight Watcher Night" (Wednesday's) and even those little "I just had one chip" occasions. If I don't know the points, I'll write it down anyways. 

-Earn 70 AP's for the month

-Increase my weights at the gym

-No more than 2 rest days a week

-Run/walk 3 days a week

With the holidays coming and things CRAZY busy at work I know I'm going to be stressed out but it's essential that I hold on to my goals and my "WHY". I have come too far to crash and burn like I did last December and I don't want to do that to my body OR my mind. So I won't.

It's going to be tough, but I'm tougher.

-t

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